


The Emotions That Guide Us

by mini_cutie



Series: soulmate au [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Akaashi Keiji Is So Done, Akaashi Keiji-centric, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Angst and Feels, Bokuto Koutarou-centric, Canon Compliant, F/M, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Kuroo Tetsurou-centric, M/M, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-12
Updated: 2018-12-27
Packaged: 2019-09-17 05:13:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16968333
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mini_cutie/pseuds/mini_cutie
Summary: Tsukishima looked so beautiful under the moonlight. It hit his hair in just the right way, making it look like he had a halo surrounding his head. His brown eyes, light and glittering, seemed so big as he gazed down at Akaashi's wrist.Akaashi didn't have to look down at his wrist to know the names etched on it. He knew the names by heart, could write each stroke of the kanji with his eyes closed.Instead of staring at something he was already so familiar with, he let himself stare at Tsukishima Kei, the enigma that both Akaashi and his soulmates were so heard pressed to solve.Tsukishima Kei with his constellation of freckles, all splashed along his cheeks. With his soft lips that he kept sucking into his mouth. With his long eyelashes that brushed against his skin when he blinked.Akaashi knew he was far gone the moment he laid his eyes on Tsukishima. He knew for a fact that Bokuto and Kuroo were too. He just wished with all of his heart that Tsukishima himself would provide the final puzzle piece that would bring the four of them together.





	1. light.

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Names That Bind Us](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11987172) by [mini_cutie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mini_cutie/pseuds/mini_cutie). 



> so i really wanted to write a sort of companion piece to my other story, the names that bind us. i wanted to make it in the point of view of kuroo/bokuto/akaashi because i wanted people to see how unreliable of a narrator all four of them are? 
> 
> there are just so many different little things that ended building up until it exploded into sort of that whole plot twist and i wanted everyone to be able to see them.
> 
> i thought that the best way to highlight exactly how everything led up to tsukishima's breakdown was to show everyone's point of view and to show exactly how the misunderstandings had formed.

Bokuto met Kuroo first. It had been during a training camp in the first year of high school. The two of them were on opposite sides of the court, separated by a net.

Kuroo was criminally handsome. His black hair was messy but it didn't take away from his devilish smirk or the way his eyes gleamed mischievously. He didn't just look good, either. Kuroo blocked every single shot that came by him with ease. He looked sleek and flexible, almost like a cat.

Bokuto Koutarou was smitten.

The hardest part was telling Kuroo and, even then, it wasn't that hard. Bokuto was really good with people. In fact, he was often called a people person because of just how good he was at socializing with others. So, he simply waltzed over, wide grin on his face and announced his name rather loudly.

Bokuto would never forget the expression on Kuroo’s face at that moment. His eyebrows shot up, mouth going slack and eyes going wide. Then, in a split second, it was all gone and Bokuto was pulled into a hug.

The two of them met Akaashi next.

Bokuto met Akaashi first and he was just as in love with Akaashi, however different he was from Kuroo.

Akaashi had a more gentle charm than Kuroo. If Kuroo was the devil, Akaashi looked like an angel. Especially with his long eyelashes and his soft smile. Kuroo was head-first without thinking and Akaashi was slow but steadfast.

Despite their differences, they both had this electrifying thing about them. They both pulled Bokuto in, captivated him with their smiles and their touches.

He wouldn’t trade either of them for anything.

Bokuto managed to get Kuroo and Akaashi to meet a few months afterwards. It wasn’t that difficult seeing as the three of them were mere train stops apart.

The trio did catch a snag when Kuroo admitted his hesitance to meet Akaashi. Kuroo didn’t know anyone else who had as many soulmates as he did. It wasn’t scary, per se, but it was nerve wracking. The three of them felt like pioneers, trekking into uncharted territory.

It took a few talks but Kuroo eventually warmed up to the idea because it wasn’t like he could avoid Akaashi forever. That and he didn’t want to hesitate and regret it later.

When they finally did meet, all of those worries seemed to dissolve. The three of them fell into a pattern and they loved each other without problems. Meeting each other and falling in love with each other seemed so easy and the three of them took everything in stride.

Soulmates weren’t as difficult as expected.

At least, that was until they remembered that there was a third name on their wrists.

Akaashi was the least worried between the three of them. He trusted fate blindly and believed, with all his heart, that there was no way fate would ever make a mistake. It was fate after all. Something so all knowing and all encompassing wouldn’t assign them a soulmate they wouldn’t come to love.

Kuroo and Bokuto were a little more hesitant. 

Just like before, Kuroo was hesitant because it was unheard of. Soulmates didn’t get more than one. They didn’t get someone so magnificent as Akaashi alongside someone so electrifying as Bokuto. They didn’t get two of the  _ same gender _ .

Kuroo was already lucky enough to be loved by two wonderful  _ boys _ . What if his luck had ran out? What if all of his doubts about this person, about this  _ soulmate _ , was true? Would he love them eventually? Would he have to force himself to love them? To love  _ her? _

It sounded almost like a homophobic agenda.  _ Gay man thinks he’s gay until he meets his beautiful soulmate--someone who is a girl. Suddenly, he’s not so gay anymore _ .

He’s heard that propaganda before, heard people chant that same-sex soulmates were mistakes, that fate had mispelled or misassigned. That, if the mistake was corrected, gay men and women wouldn’t exist. That they shouldn’t exist.

Yes, they lived in a society where nobody was judged for being with someone who was their soulmate, that was true, but that didn’t make things like discrimination any less prominent.

Kuroo knew Bokuto felt the same way. The both of them had believed so fervently that they were  _ gay _ , that they could only love other men and nobody else. They didn’t live through all of the homophobia only to be told by fate otherwise.

Unlike Kuroo, Bokuto tried to keep a more positive outlook on the situation. It was possible that the person was actually a guy. It was possible that, perhaps, they had read the kanji wrong. 

Kanji could be written one way but said in a different way. Bokuto wasn’t exactly sure how else you could read the name but, certainly, there could be some way.

Or, even more likely, Hotaru was just a boy. After all, though Hotaru was mainly a name for girls, it could easily be unisex. Bokuto always seemed to claim that it was easy to imagine a boy named Hotaru if he tried hard enough.

_ Plus _ , Bokuto liked to believe _ , it couldn’t be a coincidence that Hotaru and the Ko in Bokuto’s first name both meant light.  _

No matter how positive Bokuto made it sound, though, and how much Akaashi insisted there was no way, Kuroo still thought negatively about their third soulmate. Unless he could see, with his own eyes, that their soulmate was just as wonderful as Akaashi, just as amazing as Bokuto, he could never allow himself to get his hopes up high.

Their third soulmate was a girl. There was no getting around that. Her name was Hotaru. Hotaru was, predominantly, a girl name. Kuroo Tetsurou had never encountered a girl he could love.

Either way, it seemed, there was nothing for them to worry about, apparently. Tsukishima itself was a very uncommon last name and Hotaru was pretty rare too. Not as rare as the last name Tsukishima (the three of them had false alarms when they had met multiple Hotaru’s) but the combination was almost impossible to find.

That was until they met their first Tsukishima.


	2. pull.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Y-Yeah.” Kuroo nodded slowly, removing his arm from around Bokuto’s shoulders before shrugging “I mean-- That kid didn’t speak up much, though. I barely remember any of the other team members’ names and they actually tried to speak to me.”
> 
> “I remember thinking he was especially cute but that he had a stick up his ass.” Kuroo then admitted, scratching his cheek sheepishly before coughing as if to cover up his embarrassment “That was it though. He wasn’t a spectacular player and he kept that angry expression on his face the entire time.”

Bokuto wiped his face off with the towel Akaashi handed to him, a small scowl on his face. He did not like the fact that Fukurodani was so close to winning and yet they didn’t win. Yes, it was true that the match had only been a practice match. Still, practice or not, Bokuto would’ve preferred that Kuroo didn’t have another win to tease him about.

In fact, he showed his distaste with the large frown that stretched across his face.

“Awhh, are you being a sore loser, Bo?” Kuroo slinked over, wrapping an arm around Bokuto’s shoulders, the usual handsome smirk stretched across his face.

Bokuto simply turned away, harrumphing and grumbling. “There are more practice matches to come! I”ll beat you by the end of the Tokyo Training Camp.”

Akaashi didn’t react much to the two as they fooled around but he did let a small smile slip onto his face as he stood close by. The two were always like that, teasing each other and pushing each other around.

He knew, though, from experience that the two were merely joking around. Despite the irritated expression on Bokuto’s face, he enjoyed Kuroo’s close proximity. In fact, he looked like he was about to pull Akaashi close as well.

“Tsukishima!”

The name jolts all three of them like lightning suddenly coursing through their veins. Akaashi himself could feel something stirring in his stomach, in his chest,  _ in his heart _ . Something made it palpitate, made it beat faster and faster.

It was the name.

Bokuto’s head snapped to the voice, heart beating all too rapidly too. It came from that really nice player from Karasuno. He was walking towards someone else, a cute blonde with glasses.

“Do you think..?” Akaashi’s question trails off as if he couldn't settle on one way to end it. Did he want to assume that this boy was their soulmate? Would he let himself? Or did the three of them want to settle with the thought that, perhaps, this was just their soulmate’s relative?

As if he could sense the group's eyes on him, the Tsukishima boy suddenly turned and met Akaashi's eyes. 

Something in Akaashi's chest lurched then, like it his heart desperately wanted to reach out to this freshman blonde he didn't even know. This handsome freshman with beautiful chocolate eyes and porcelain skin.

"Kei? Bo?" Kuroo looked concerned as he placed a hand on Akaashi's shoulder, eyebrows slightly furrowed, his other arm still wrapped around Bokuto’s shoulder.

Akaashi couldn't answer him. Instead, his eyes and his attention was completely directed to this Tsukishima who grew flustered at the eye contact and quickly turned away. Even then, Akaashi still kept his eyes on the boy as if he couldn’t bring himself to tear his gaze away.

There was something about this boy, Akaashi knew it.

“You can’t possibly assume that--” Kuroo quickly tried to convince both his soulmates that, surely, they weren’t lucky enough to have the very first Tsukishima they met to be the same Tsukishima scrawled on their wrists.

Kuroo’s words were quickly stopped by Bokuto though, as the boy turned to Kuroo with wide eyes “You went on that practice match with Karasuno a little bit ago, right? It was at the very start of the season, right?”

“Y-Yeah.” Kuroo nodded slowly, removing his arm from around Bokuto’s shoulders before shrugging “I mean-- That kid didn’t speak up much, though. I barely remember any of the other team members’ names and they actually tried to speak to me.”

“I remember thinking he was especially cute but that he had a stick up his ass.” Kuroo then admitted, scratching his cheek sheepishly before coughing as if to cover up his embarrassment “That was it though. He wasn’t a spectacular player and he kept that angry expression on his face the entire time.”

“But his name. It’s Tsukishima. That player, number 2, he called him that.” Akaashi quipped right back as if he was afraid they’d forgotten.

Kuroo and Bokuto couldn’t even make themselves forget that moment. It was like something--electricty?--zinged right up their spines. The two weren’t sure whether or not the reaction was because of the fact that the boy was their soulmate or if it was just merely the surprise.

Either way, none of them could confirm the boy’s first name. Kuroo had been honest when he admitted to barely knowing any of the Karasuno players’ names much less a boy he barely interacted with. Bokuto and Akaashi, on the other hand, hadn’t had enough time to get themselves acquainted with any of the Karasuno players.

After all, they didn’t really have any incentive to do so quickly. The two teams had a week to get to know each other. At least, they hadn’t had an incentive til now.

Now, they had to get to know that Tsukishima boy, the one with the cute thick rimmed glasses and ruffled blonde hair. The one that so cutely got embarrassed when he had met their eyes.

A thought suddenly popped into Bokuto’s head “Do you think he knows?” 

“We’re not even sure if he’s the same Tsukishima.” Kuroo drawled out, tisking and shaking his head all the while before sighing “You have a point, though. If he was the same Tsukishima, wouldn’t he have approached us by now?”

“It’s not as if we’re just a couple of plain players for other teams. We’re the Captains. Surely, he’d have heard our names by now and would have approached.” Kuroo continued to explain when Bokuto stared back at him with a confused expression.

After his prompt explanation, a look of realization crossed Bokuto’s face “You’re right.”

“Not necessarily.” Akaashi quickly intervened, face stoic except for a hint of defiance in his eyes “Maybe he doesn’t pay attention to names like you, Kuroo-san.”

Kuroo huffed at the jab obviously aimed at him. Still, he couldn’t exactly say anything against that. Akaashi had a point. There was a possibility that he didn’t know their names. It was a small possibility, of course, but a possibility nonetheless.

Feeling the tense air around them, Bokuto moved forward to wrap both his arms around Kuroo and Akaashi “Now, now, it’s okay. Don’t worry about it! There’s probably going to be an opportunity for us to get to know him later.”

Akaashi glanced back at where the Tsukishima boy was. He was facing a shorter boy, with dark hair, and there was a grumpy expression on his face. Despite the expression, instead of looking ugly, it made Tsukishima look somehow adorable.

Suddenly, Akaashi found himself hoping that the opportunity to get to know him appeared soon.


	3. hope.

* * *

“So, what’s our plan with this Tsukishima kid?” Kuroo spoke up from his position on the floor, his back pressed against the wall of the gym.

The sun had set a long time ago and the practice matches with the other teams had ended more recently. Yet, even with that, they were still on the grounds of the school. The three of them were stuck in the Third Gym where they were supposed to be practicing.

It wasn’t just the three of them, though. A couple of the other Nekoma players had also stayed behind but, mostly, to help Lev practice his basic skills.

The guy was tall enough and that definitely was an advantage but his height meant nothing if he didn’t know the first thing about volleyball. Unfortunately, the giant didn’t seem to clearly understand that because he kept wanting to learn the flashier moves of the game instead of focusing on the first things he needed to know.

Kuroo clearly blamed that freak quick couple on Karasuno who impressed everyone with the way they seemed to get past most blocks that came their way.

Though, for some reason, Kuroo noticed that they weren’t on their best. It was odd but he had just brushed that fact aside. Perhaps they had been tired. After all, they came to the practice games late.

Finally, someone responded to Kuroo’s question and it had ended up being Akaashi “Why don’t we just tell him he’s our soulmate? What’s so difficult about that?”

“Well, we don’t want to scare him off. We don’t even know if he’s our soulmate.” Kuroo quickly rebutted though, rather than an annoyed expression, he felt more lazy and laid-back.

Earlier, when they had first heard of the boy, he was surely much more difficult to deal with. Now, he just didn’t want to end up in a fight with either Bokuto or Akaashi. Though he liked both teasing and riling them up, he never crossed a line with them on purpose.

Akaashi, thankfully, took this explanation easily enough. “You’re right. We should at least find out what his first name is.”

“I tried eavesdropping on a couple of conversations but I only heard them calling him ‘Tsukki’ or ‘Tsukishima’.” Bokuto plopped himself down beside Kuroo before quickly crossing his legs “Which is, of course, weird.”

“Then again, he is a first year player so it’s understandable if he isn’t on a first name basis with the team.” Akaashi pointed out, perhaps as a way to explain the rather obvious detachment the boy had with the rest of the team.

It was the kind of detachment that was obvious, even to outsiders. Whenever the team celebrated anything loudly--like a point or a good match--Tsukishima often was just to the side, same monotone expression on his face.

He was a lot like Akaashi in that sense. Except, despite popular belief, Akaashi was actually extremely close to the rest of the Fukurodani team. Both Bokuto, Kuroo and the rest of the team silently agreed that Akaashi was a lot like the brains of their entire operation.

Which is, to say, that he knew how to control Bokuto and his mood swings as well as bring the best out of the rest of the team.

Tsukishima wasn’t like that in the slightest. It was like there was an obvious chasm between him and the rest of Karasuno and he couldn’t bring himself to cross it.

“Or, maybe… he’s just shy?” Bokuto offered another explanation.

Kuroo nodded at that solemnly “That means we should be more cautious about our approach with him, then.”

At the confused expressions of both Akaashi and Bokuto, Kuroo quickly elaborated “If he’s shy, maybe he wouldn’t want us to approach him.”

“True.” Bokuto hummed out his agreement.

Akaashi, on the other hand, wasn’t satisfied by this. Instead, he frowned, looking from Bokuto to Kuroo and back “That might not be entirely true.”

Both Bokuto and Kuroo made small sounds of confusion though, as they looked at Akaashi, they could immediately tell that there was something he was upset about.

“What’s wrong, Keiji?” Bokuto looked like he was about to stand and comfort Akaashi with Kuroo following close behind but, when Akaashi held out a hand, the two of them abruptly stopped mid-move.

“This is like that time we met all over again.” Akaashi tried to keep the accusatory tone from his voice and, instead of monotone, it made him sound soft and insecure “It hurt so much to wait.”

Kuroo grew silent and Bokuto didn’t know exactly what to say.

It was true. Out of the three, Akaashi had been the latest addition to their little team. Akaashi had told them that it had been hard waiting. It was just so difficult to know that your soulmate was out there, within reach, and yet not being able to reach out. It was painful.

Kuroo had gone through so many nights apologising for making Akaashi wait, for making him feel insecure and hurt.

Akaashi usually said that he forgave Kuroo, that he understood where Kuroo came from, that he understood how Kuroo felt.

However, at that time, in the Third Gym, with their fourth soulmate so close, Akaashi couldn’t find it in himself to be as forgiving. Make a mistake once, it’s an accident. Make a mistake twice, it’s a conscious decision.

“I know you’re scared but-- Didn’t you see him?” For the first time in a long time, there was a strong feeling in Akaashi’s expression, a strong emotion, something akin to desire and hopelessness “Didn’t you feel that pull in your heart?”

Kuroo didn’t respond, just turned to look away, eyes stuck on the floor in front of him. He didn’t know what to say to such a loaded question.

If he was being honest with himself, he would respond that, yes, he did feel some sort of tug. It wasn’t a strong tug, not like the one he got when he saw Akaashi for the first time or that one he got when Bokuto had introduced himself. Still, there was _something_.

The thing was, however, he didn’t want to hold onto that feeling, hold onto that hope. What if he did and he ended up getting hurt? What if he let himself hope and, instead of it being how he wanted it to be, it instead happened to be the exact opposite?

Because, yes, they could hope that this boy was their soulmate. That didn’t decrease the chance that he was just their soulmate's relative or that he wasn’t even related to their real soulmate at all.

Would Kuroo take that chance of getting hurt?

Before Kuroo could answer, however, the sound of footsteps pulled the three out of their heated conversation. When they turned to look, they were met with Yaku and his disapproving expression.

Kuroo sighed as if to express his irritation but part of him was relieved that the conversation was interrupted before he had to spill his guts.

“So, Yukkun and the others want to take a break from dealing with that stubborn giant.” Yaku started, huffing as he crossed his arms before peering at Kuroo “I know that you guys are talking about pretty ‘important’ stuff--”

“We are!” Bokuto quickly intervened, indignant

“--but could you please continue helping Lev practice so that he doesn’t forget everything we just taught him?” Yaku finished, not even acknowledging Bokuto’s interjection “The three of you need to practice anyway.”

“Us? Need to practice?” Bokuto huffed out, sounding much more indignant and offended than before.

Kuroo nodded slowly, sighing as he stood “It can’t be helped, I guess.”

“Good.” Yaku patted Kuroo’s back just as he passed by, forcing Kuroo to stumble forward just a bit.

In retaliation, Kuroo glared at Yaku but before he could say anything witty, Yaku beat him to it “By the way, that player the three of you are talking about… He’s from Karasuno isn’t he? You know, Karasuno should be getting done with their punishment by now.”

“The only way to the room that Karasuno is staying in is through that hallway right outside, you know.” Yaku added, smirk only widening. Kuroo hated how smug that kid looked.

Akaashi, on the other hand, looked like his interest had been piqued and his attention was quickly drawn to the entrance of the gym that Yaku was talking about as if Tsukishima was already out there.

Bokuto seemed just as interested

Kuroo immediately suppressed a sigh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading this far into the story!!! if you liked it, leave a kudos or a comment!!! i'll try to update as soon as i can but it's finals week here so i don't know if i'll be able to. i'll try tho!!!
> 
> if you wanna get some updates, my tumblr is mini-ghost-writer and my twitter is minikkukkungi. there's not much on either of them but like... if you wanna follow anyway lmao. on my twitter, there's a poll up on which story you guys want updated asap? so if you wanna vote on that, hmu! i only have my top three most popular stories on there but you can dm me or retweet it with a vote if the story you wanna vote on isn't an option


	4. confusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao this is super fckn long as hecc. twice as long as usual chapters. sorry about that...

“Hey, four-eyes!”

Like all the other names that Kuroo made up for everyone else, the nickname he had chosen for Tsukishima slipped past his lips. Kuroo was like that, sometimes; all impulsive and in-the-moment.

Seeing the flash of irritation in Tsukishima’s eyes at the sound of the nickname made Kuroo regret it almost immediately. He didn’t know why but he suddenly wished he could control his mouth sometimes.

Still, he continued, smirk a little less smug as he waved the blonde over “Wanna jump some blocks for us?” 

There was a look on Tsukishima’s face like he was politely glancing at both Kuroo and Bokuto. Kuroo wondered if Tsukishima was trying to recall who they were or how they knew him. Bokuto, on the other hand, simply puffed up his chest and placed his hands on his hips as if he was trying to preen and impress Tsukishima.

Akaashi didn’t do anything, just hung back, sharp eyes watching the freshman in front of them. From Tsukishima’s position in front of the gym entrance, Kuroo was almost completely sure that he wouldn’t be able to see Akaashi.

Maybe Tsukishima would drop his guard a little if he could.

Finally, Tsukishima replied, polite smile on his face “Oh, actually, I’m done for the night.” 

The smile was fake, of course. Kuroo had given enough of them in his lifetime. Now, he could recognize it without a doubt.

“What?” After a moment’s hesitation, the word seemed to slip both Kuroo and Bokuto’s mouths at the same time. Their tone was accidentally appalled and their voices absolutely in sync.

Kuroo would’ve laughed about it if it weren’t for the fact that he felt a little confused. Most dedicated volleyball players he knew scrambled for a chance like this but, for Tsukishima, he didn’t even seem conflicted. He threw the chance away without hesitation.

Why would a volleyball player on a quickly rising powerhouse decline so easily?

Bokuto beat Kuroo and spoke first, shifting to lean against the doorway of the gym “There’s no point in us practicing if we don’t have a blocker! Please?”

“Why does it have to be me?” Tsukishima really tried to keep the irritation out of his voice but it definitely shone through “What about the rest of Fukurodani?”

Neither Bokuto nor Kuroo answered Tsukishima’s question. Kuroo himself felt a little irritated by the fact that Tsukishima seemed to want to brush aside such a nice gesture. If it weren’t for the fact that they really wanted to get to know him, Kuroo wouldn’t have tried to convince Tsukishima any further. 

As it was, however, that wasn’t the case. Akaashi really wanted this and both Bokuto and Kuroo had agreed that they would put aside their hesitation. Still, because their plan had been so impulsive and poorly made, Kuroo had no excuse to give Tsukishima. Instead, he glanced at Bokuto from the corner of his eyes 

Akaashi peeked from in between Kuroo and Bokuto then, expression neutral “Bokuto spikes hard and he doesn't get tired easily so everyone in Fukurodani left early to escape practice.” 

Both Kuroo and Bokuto praised the heavens for Akaashi’s quick thinking. Though, it seemed, Akaashi was starting to look irritated by the fact that Kuroo and Bokuto weren’t trying hard enough to get Tsukishima to practice with them.

Kuroo returned the look with his own look that, hopefully, conveyed the fact that he seriously was trying.

There was a moment of silence then. Finally, Tsukishima moved but it wasn’t towards the gym. Instead, he glanced at Kuroo with an almost desperate expression.

It was confusing. He didn’t understand fully why Tsukishima wanted so desperately to get away from them or, perhaps, from volleyball practice.

Still, he promised to try for Akaashi so he gestured behind him “I'm busy training this useless giant.”

At that, Tsukishima glanced further into the gym. He seemed to quickly notice Lev and there was a look of realization on his face. He must’ve recognized Lev from their earlier Karasuno v. Nekoma practice. Certainly, it was probably hard not to recognize Lev since he went head-to-head with the orange shrimp.

At the sound of Kuroo’s voice, however, Lev sat up almost immediately “I'll jump all of the blocks!”

“If you want to be a regular on the team, you need to practice on your receive!” Kuroo quickly retorted, words harsh and sharp. His words, of course, were true but, mostly, Kuroo wanted him to butt out of their plans.

At that, the giant slumped back down, defeated once again. Tsukishima scrunched his nose at that a little. It seemed like such a pompous thing to do but, for some reason, it looked really cute. Kuroo cursed his brain.

Bokuto and Akaashi seemed to think the same exact thing. They had a smitten look on their faces and Bokuto even looked like he wanted to crush Tsukishima into a giant hug.

“Anyway, Bokuto may not look like it but he's one of the top five best spikers in Japan.” Kuroo quickly pulled both Akaashi and Bokuto before Tsukishima could start thinking they were weird.

Kuroo even went so far as to wrap his arm around Bokuto “He’d be really good to practice with.”

Of course, Akaashi being Akaashi, he responded quickly, smirk tugging at the corners of his usually straight laced lips “He isn't in the top three so don't get your hopes too high up.”

“Keeeiji!” Bokuto shouted out in protest, a blush starting to dust his cheeks.

Since Kuroo was pretty used to Akaashi teasing Bokuto and everything, he simply chuckled, entertained by the both of them and his heart fluttering just slightly from how cute the two were acting.

Bokuto turned to Kuroo with a slightly irritated expression “And you! Don't just laugh!”

Kuroo ignored Bokuto’s protests and, instead, directed a handsome smirk towards Tsukishima “Besides, you’re a middle blocker, right? I saw you play. Don't you need the practice?”

As Kuroo had predicted, that had done the trick. Tsukishima gave a small huff before quickly moving to past the three and into the gym.

Bokuto looked surprised but gave a thumbs up towards Kuroo. He then glanced at Tsukishima’s back before giving a more insistent thumbs up. Kuroo followed his gaze to Tsukishima’s  _ back _ .

Or, more specifically, the way the muscles at the back of his legs strained, the way his gym shorts hiked up just a little bit and, of course, his--

Kuroo quickly scoffed before wrapping his arm around Bokuto’s once again. Except, this time, he pulled, making Bokuto stumble.

It was going to be a long night.

Kuroo was only proven right when Tsukishima continued to irritate him as time went on. Of course, in reality, he was sure Tsukishima wasn’t doing it on purpose. 

After all, Kuroo wasn’t even in their little practice match. To Tsukishima, Kuroo was too busy helping Lev practice and was, of course, not paying attention to their game.

That wasn’t the case. Kuroo couldn’t help but watch. All he saw was Bokuto and Akaashi winning over and over with Tsukishima barely giving any effort into blocking. Or, maybe, it seemed that way but, truly, Tsukishima was just that bad?

Kuroo pushed that thought away. He had seen Tsukishima play before. He had seen that calculating expression on the court. He knew for a fact that Tsukishima wasn’t just a pretty face. He had a brain behind those honey eyes.

So, it really didn’t make sense to Kuroo why Tsukishima was barely trying.

It wasn’t just rude to Bokuto and Akaashi who weren’t getting the practice they (pretended to) need but it was also just a complete waste of time. Why was Tsukishima just  _ wasting their time _ like this?

Yet, even with all of that, Kuroo couldn’t find it in himself to be irritated. Instead, he felt some sort of understanding. Tsukishima confused him but, for some reason, all Kuroo could think was that there must’ve been a reason. Instead of being angry, all Kuroo wanted to do was find out what that reason was.

“Take a break, Lev. I’ll go help Kei and Kou.” Kuroo glanced at the silver-haired giant but, it seemed, he wasn’t listening. Instead, he was sprawled across the floor, chest heaving. Kuroo almost rolled his eyes. He hadn’t done much, just the usual training he himself did.

In any case, Kuroo left Lev to rest and walked towards the net in the center of the gym.

“Wow, you just beat a single blocker. Congratulations, Bokuto-san.”

“Keeeiji!” The grin fell from Bokuto’s face only to be replaced with a pout. Kuroo held back a chuckle as he thought about how cute Bokuto was at times. At least, when he wasn’t being purposefully annoying.

Before Tsukishima could say anything in response, Kuroo stopped right next to him “Well, how about two blockers then?”

Tsukishima looked surprised by Kuroo’s sudden appearance. The surprise, of course, morphed to a more confused expression. Kuroo watched as the blonde glanced at Lev before looking back at him and then again. Kuroo held back another chuckle.

Still, it wasn’t the time to laugh. Kuroo needed Tsukishima to focus as much as possible. Without even hesitating, Kuroo  crouched into position before tugging Tsukishima down “Hey, four eyes, make sure you keep that straight in check.” 

As he did that, an odd expression took over Tsukishima’s face. It was almost concerning. Kuroo even wanted to say that, perhaps, Tsukishima had even stopped breathing. But, no, that couldn’t have been it.

Kuroo glanced up and his gaze was met by Akaashi who looked concerned too. Bokuto seemed pretty oblivious, most likely because he was more focused on getting past Kuroo’s block. Bokuto was smart but he could have a pretty one track mind sometimes.

Even with their concern, Akaashi still moved to spike the ball. Kuroo could barely hear his voice, all he could see was Akaashi’s lips moving and then, quickly, he jumped as if on instinct. At that point, it really was. He had blocked so many volleyballs that he barely had to think. 

Then, there was that familiar feeling of skin against plastic. The thump of it stung but it was the good kind of sting. Kuroo watched as the ball flew towards him and then bounced off of his arms.

Then, he fell back onto his feet, triumphant expression on his face. Bokuto, on the other hand, looked pretty bummed out. This time, Kuroo didn’t hold back his laugh. He glanced at Akaashi, hoping to see a proud expression on his face or maybe even a a smirk.

Instead, Akaashi’s expression was far off. Kuroo followed to Tsukishima who was gripping at his left wrist. Kuroo’s heart seemed to skip a beat. He didn’t know why but his mind raced a little at the thought of, perhaps, that wrist being the same one that had Kuroo’s name scrawled across it.

Bokuto noticed too but, thankfully, all of them seemed to be on the same page. They couldn’t just ask Tsukishima. Like Kuroo had said before, it might scare him away. He might be too shy to open up to them now.

“Hey, Megane-kun, you have a good read on things but your block is weak.” Tsukishima turned to Bokuto with a slightly irritated expression but Bokuto pretended not to notice “I get worried I might break your arms or something.” 

“Well, you know, I'm growing.” Tsukishima attempted to hide how irritated he really felt and, instead, straightened in an attempt to make his height over Bokuto obvious even across the net “I still have a ways to go when it comes to muscles and height.”

Bokuto really took offense to that, pouting and crossing his arms. Kuroo found it cute but his mind was still half occupied by Tsukishima. 

It was weird how, earlier, he had been so adamant about not getting close or, even, perhaps, getting attached to Tsukishima. Now, though, Kuroo was there, concerned about Tsukishima and his odd behavior, curious about what made Tsukishima tick.

“Hey, four eyes, Bo has a point. If you take things too easy, that Shorty’ll take all the glory from you.” Kuroo interrupted Tsukishima’s conversation with Bokuto only to wrap his arm around Tsukishima’s shoulders “You're in the same position as him, right?”

Kuroo wanted to know more, wanted to get Tsukishima to talk more. Maybe this was the sign that Tsukishima was their soulmate. This weird attraction Kuroo had for Tsukishima might’ve been the bond between them as soulmates.

Still, it seemed, what Kuroo had said wasn’t exactly the right thing to say. Instead of getting Tsukishima to rant about that short middle blocker, Tsukishima clammed up. He suddenly looked like he was tired, like he wanted to be smaller than he was, like he wanted to be anywhere else but there.

For the second time that night, Kuroo wished he had thought over his words a little bit more carefully.

Still, there was no stopping it now. Whatever was in Tsuksihima’s head, whatever weighed so heavily on his shoulders that made them slouch like so, would stay there and there was nothing the three of them could do to get closer.

It was obvious Tsukishima struggled to pick his words carefully “I don't think I can do anything about that.”

Another unexpected thing. Kuroo was so confused and, when he glanced at Bokuto and Akaashi, they seemed to share the sentiment. 

“There's an obvious difference between Hinata and me. A difference that I don't think I could cross.” Tsukishima didn’t have to say it but it was obvious that there was something more behind his words. 

At that, the three upperclassmen were taken aback. 

Bokuto looked almost crestfallen. That was understandable. Between the three of them, Bokuto had always been the more empathetic one. Surely, though they couldn’t entirely understand what Tsukishima was feeling, there was a sadness in his words that Bokuto probably sensed.

Even Kuroo and Akaashi could pick up on it. 

Before they could say anything, however, Nekoma had returned from their little break. Though Kuroo had been opposed to it before, he couldn’t help but think that their return was very ill timed. 

Now, Tsukishima didn’t have a reason to stay.

Inuoka was already claiming to want to help Bokuto and Akaashi practice. He, no doubt, saw that the volleyball basket was next to the net and put two and two together. Even Yaku and Kai returned to Lev, helping him up with an irritated expression.

“Well, looks like you have more people to block for you. I'll just be in the way. If you'll excuse me.” Finally, Tsukishima did the first expected thing all night and started to head to the doors of the gym, all the while waving goodbye to Bokuto, Kuro and Akaashi.

All three of them couldn’t do much. They had no reason to keep him in the gym. Instead, they just stood there, watching him go.

“I guess you stepped on a nerve, Kuroo.” Akaashi sighed, running a hand through his hair. Inuoka seemed to perk up at that statement but, from the confused expression on his face, it was obvious he didn’t know what was going on.

Bokuto, on the other hand, continued to look like a kicked puppy, his stare focused on where Tsukishima had been only moments ago.

Kuroo sighed too but his was more ragged and tired “I didn’t mean to--”

Akaashi nodded quickly, hand coming up to stop Kuroo. There was a soft expression on his face, one that comforted Kuroo and assured him that Akaashi didn’t blame him for making Tsukishima turn tail and run.

“I guess you were right about one thing, though.” Akaashi stepped forward, taking Kuroo’s hand and rubbing his thumb across the back of it “We can’t just approach him willy-nilly.”

Bokuto perked up then, confused.

Akaashi, of course, elaborated “I don’t understand why but, the entire time, I got the feeling that he was trying to run away from us.”

Unfortunately, Kuroo couldn’t help but agree.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading this far into the story!!! if you liked it, leave a kudos or a comment!!! i'll try to update as soon as i can. finals week is over but my parents dragged me to a long roadtrip across state lines and im trying to write as much as i can when we stop by hotels for the night!!!
> 
> if you wanna get some updates, my tumblr is mini-ghost-writer and my twitter is minikkukkungi. on my twitter, there's a poll up on which story you guys want updated asap? so if you wanna vote on that, hmu!


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